Tag Archives: issues

Because of you..

Because of you, my child has to grow up not only being a minority, but being a minority with baggage. Because of you, I don’t know if I’m the victim of rape, because I never liked you like that, but you were my friend; and you’d never do that, right? You’re in jail, because of you. Sure, she might have lied, but it was your door that she walked through.. Because of you, my child’s never known her father, and because of you I hope she never needs to. Because of you I often forget that she was created by more than just me, because it’s been just me from day one.. Because of You.
Because of you, she’s not an only child, and I don’t know the things they’ll discuss. Because of you, I don’t know how you’ll be portrayed to her, but it won’t be as a father. Because of you, there’s going to be a stigma that follows All of us. Because people ask questions that I don’t know the answers to.. Because of you, there’s an empty space on my child’s birth certificate, and a void I hope we’ll someday fill. Because of you, I wonder how Prince Charming became another devil in disguise, so quickly.

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Reflecting on my life, I never really could get it right. There was always quirks and twists. I hate love, and because of such have bad relationships with other people. I will always have mental issues; and although they’re easy for me to set aside most days… They still remain intact. My sanity on the other hand, does not. 

 

Personally, I’m a very stubborn girl. The hardest words for me to say are “I love you” “i’m sorry” and/or “I miss you.” For me to say any of them, you should feel special. Especially when it’s without hesitation, because I could not say those without meaning it.